THE ABUSED CHILD: Path Way To Healing – Pt 2
This continued till I was 9 years and the most disgusting thing happened. It was a Muslim holiday and as usual, I was on the school premises with some of the borders from another secondary school. This older senior in SS2 called me to her room. I thought she wanted to send me on an errand until she told me to undress. She told me to touch her breast and suck it like I was licking lollipop. After I was done, she told me to put my mouth in her vagina. That was the most disgusting sexual assault I had ever experienced. I did not even know anything about homosexuality but I was utterly disgusted. She also made it habitual. I was now abused by men and a woman!!! the men penetrated me while the woman told me to touch her. I went through this turmoil for six years till I graduated primary school.
An event happened one time that I cannot bring myself to accept. It was the next day after the close of the term. All the students had gone home except for this senior whose parents were coming from a journey to pick him up. I was also in school since the house mistress had not closed. The house mistress for the female and male hostel as well as the headmaster were in a meeting.
The senior boy called to remove my pants and climb a tree. While I was on the tree, he told me to spread my legs and he was throwing stones to my vagina. As I was sobbing, he threatened me not to cry loud else he would kill me and nothing would happen. Despicable things had happened to me in that school but this was horrible.
All through this time, my mum’s family were looking for her. They finally found her in a man’s house and took them for rehabilitation.
I finally finished primary school and did not what to do next. My family insisted I leave that environment and go to a different place. They were concerned about the physical abandonment, they had no idea of the sexual torment I was going through.
My mum wrote a letter from the rehabilitation centre to allow her relatives to take me home. I was going to be finally free from these monsters and beasts. For the first time in six years, I was going home to my family. I was so happy. I laughed and cried at the same time. I was finally going to be free from that dungeon. I was damaged but I was still glad to be finally free.
I packed my clothes in a bag beaming left and right. I had never told anyone the things that they were doing to me but some people knew about it. Leaving that school was the best thing that ever happened to me. I left that school and never looked back.
That was the last time I was ever sexually assaulted. I got admitted to a catholic all-sex school and nothing like that ever happened. I finished secondary and got admitted to a private university and I was safe as well. I never got into a relationship because I thought all men were beastly like my father who abandoned me and the monsters that continuously raped me in primary school.
I graduated from university and that was when my depression started. I did not get a job immediately. Because I was idle, I started having flashbacks of my childhood. I would be sweating profusely all night, sometimes, I would cry terribly. All these while, I had suppressed my childhood memories and now they were haunting me.
About a year later, I got a job in the bank but these memories would still not go away. My schedule at the bank was so stressful but the depressive emotions kept disturbing my activities. I would go to the restroom to cry, then return to smile at customers. I started to make mistakes due to the interruptions of my mind. I was not meeting targets and was making mistakes on slips. It graduated to a full-blown insomnia. I would be awake all night crying while I had terrible headaches at work. I started taking sleeping tablets and would still not sleep. The lack of sleep was interrupting my daily activities.
My boss noticed and told me to apply for emergency three weeks’ leave. She did not ask me for any details. She just drove me to the Arogi Foundation office and my healing journey began.
A female clinical psychologist attended to me and we spoke for three hours. For the first time in years, I told somebody about the things I had gone through. As I was talking, it felt as if they occurred yesterday. My next session was daily for five days before it was reduced to weekly. I was taught relevant techniques to help me cope. This began my path way to healing experience.
After three weeks, I resumed at the office and everyone noticed improvements in my health. I can not say I am healed but I am 90% there. I still have my flashbacks and cry but they don’t interrupt my daily activities.
I also got into a relationship for the first time. I was 27 years old in my first relationship. Lest I forget, the therapy was also free.
I know many people have gone through similar or even worse. Please seek emotional therapy. Get help before the trauma destroys you.
IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!!!!
Call the Arogi Foundation for free therapy
Frederick Abiola-Cudjoe
Frederick Abiola Cudjoe is a blogger, content creator who is in service to Arogi Trauma Care Foundation. He is solution driven and result oriented. He has a strong passion to always make clients have the best customer service experience.
