How To Open Up About Life’s Tough Moments- Part 2
The seven (7) Practical Steps to Opening Up
Opening up is actually a process, it doesn’t just happen out of the blues. It is okay to take small intentional steps.
1. Prepare yourself emotionally.
When you are about to open up to someone start by asking yourself “what do I want to share and why”? Are u seeking advice, support or just someone you need to listen to you. Most people find it challenging to process their emotions and that is why sometimes it is difficult to open up because you really don’t understand what is going on with you neither do you understand the emotions you are experiencing.
2. Choose the right person
By choosing the right person we refer to considering the behavior, attitude and character of the person. Does the person have a god sense of reasoning, is the person empathic. Some people have sympathy but lack empathy and that is a problem.
3. Transparency and Honesty
Try as much as possible to be transparent and honest in your conversations with the person so that the he will know the best position to help.
4. Manage your expectations
The fact that you opened up to someone doesn’t mean that the person will give you 100% solution to the challenge you are facing. When you manage your expectations, you will not be so disappointed when the person cannot really meet up to your expectation. Understand the perspective from the person’s angle. No matter what the person says or no matter what the person tries to induce, try and have a good sense of understanding and whatever expectations that come out of the conversations, manage it.
5. Follow up and Show appreciation especially for the fact that the person holds your information with a high level of confidentiality.
6. Reflect on your feelings so that you can express them clearly and confidently.
7. Set boundaries. Be clear about what you are comfortable sharing and what you are not comfortable sharing.
During therapy one of the things therapists hold to is that therapist are not actually solution providers but one thing they have learnt to do is to listen actively to people’s problems and from listening they begin to guide the person to navigate through these challenging moments and how they can navigate successfully. It may actually surprise you that from talking, you begin to gain insight into the problem and when you begin to gain insight into the problem, you will begin to gain how you can actually navigate through the challenging moment and how you can actually get solutions to the problems you are overwhelmed with. It is possible and practical.
Therapists should present themselves as persons they can really open up to not, listening to people’s opinions without judging or labeling them but rather validating their experiences which is a key factor to know and show anytime people really want to open up to us.
Conclusion
The way you feel about your emotions determines whether the problem will be aggravated or will just remain the way they are.
Anxiety is a symptom of what is going on in body, in your nervous system and in your mind but what you do about the anxiety will determine whether it will be aggravated or if the symptoms would reduce or remain as they are.
Opening up about life tough issues isn’t easy but it is the first vital step towards healing and growth.
Author: Itunuoluwa Onifade, Clinical Psychologist, ATCF
Frederick Abiola-Cudjoe
Frederick Abiola Cudjoe is a blogger, content creator who is in service to Arogi Trauma Care Foundation. He is solution driven and result oriented. He has a strong passion to always make clients have the best customer service experience.
